Category: Role Play & Cosplay
On Sale Now at BB’S BOUTIQUE!!
These items (and MANY more) are now in stock and available for immediate delivery at beautifullybrokenboutique.bigcartel.com! All other items found on http://www.facebook.com/beautifullybrokensubmissiveboutique/ can be pre-ordered by emailing firstname.lastname@example.org. Happy Holidays!!!
ALL of the chokers are ON SALE for $9.99 + S/H each this week!!!
Beautifully Broken Boutique on BigCartel
You can now order all in stock jewelery items and role play scenario props directly online via BigCartel at http://beautifullybrokenboutique.bigcartel.com if you are paying for the order with your PayPal account.
Review of Dragon/Cat/Vampire Claws from Wish
I saw these online somewhere last year. I researched and posted about the use of the Claws for sensory play. Since my Dom was just as intrigued by the idea as I was, onto The List they went. And on The List they sat. About a week ago, I was browsing on the Wish app. I’ve found if you get creative with your keywords and description turn of phrase when searching, a whole wealth of insanely low cost BDSM props and implements are suddenly at your virtual fingertips and only a few clicks away from going into your personal toy box.
I purchased a set of 10, listed in various sizes, for $4.70 with a $2 shipping fee. They arrived in less than two weeks. I had originally thought I would use these Claws as the top in a sensory play scene with Daddy. I suppose that can still happen someday…because I was dominated with them instead.
The Claws are made of a nondescript silver metal alloy. I don’t know if prolonged use will cause irritation or discoloration on the wearer’s fingertips but I can’t imagine they could be worn comfortably for more than and hour or so. The sizing of each ring is uniquely graduated, some fitting over the fingers just up to the nail bed better than others on Daddy, but none were unpleasant to wear. I can only wear the small and the large sizes meant for the thumb and the pinky. The medium size slipped completely down my finger like a ring. They can always be sized down by wrapping the back of the band with a clear piece of tape.
The Black crystals are purely for decoration as they do sparkle in the light. The points of the Claws are not sharpened but they aren’t blunted either. They don’t leave scratch marks on the skin, even when more than moderate pressure is applied but they do press into the skin and grab on to pressure points and around bones. With enough force, I do believe that the skin could be very painfully punctured (but we don’t puncture the skin when we play, even in scenes where obtaining blood is the goal).
It was an amazing scene, like tickling turned into sensation play that amped up into “dry” (bloodless) vampire/primal play and then somehow turned into a lesson in orgasm control. The possibilities of creating various sensations while using these Claws are really only limited by imagination and comfort zone. If you’re into any type of the scenes listed above, dark fantasy cosplay or if you just like Gothic jewelry, I highly recommend checking out these little gems.
Wish currently offers the following selections in various colors from several different merchants:
*single piece, listed as small, medium and large
*sets of five, listed as one size fits all, 1 small, 3 medium And 1 large with measurements
*sets of ten, listed as one size fits all, 2 small, 6 medium and 2 large with measurements
Making Time For BDSM In Your Daily Life
Above everything else, BDSM is a mindset.
BDSM (Bondage, Discipline, Dominance, Submission, Sadism, Masochism) is an abstract construct which encompasses all of the physical acts of both sexual and non-sexual dominance and submission. Many people have asked what it takes to keep a BDSM relationship going long term, in both scene-only and 24/7 dynamics. The answer is simple.
It takes dedication.
We all have busy lives. Pursuing careers, responding to family obligations, fulfilling volunteer work, raising children, keeping in touch with friends and family, satisfying household responsibilities are issues we all face. We all have learned how to juggle our commitments very well.
Unfortunately, keeping so many different balls in the air sometimes means that other areas get neglected. It happens. However, making time for those relationships and activities which are important to us needs to be just as much of a priority as everything else we do in our busy day. There’s a saying which states, “If it matters to you, you will find a way. If it doesn’t matter to you, you will find an excuse”. I think this saying definitely applies to our Lifestyle relationships.
We make time for what is important to us. Plain and simple. If you have to get the kids to bed early so you and your SO can have a quiet S&M session, do it. If you have to find childcare so you and your SO can go on a weekend getaway a few times a year, do it. If you have to wake up early so you and your SO can have some uninterrupted shower sex before cooking breakfast, do it. Be creative!! Have fun with your scheduling. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking scheduled sex and scenes kills the romance. Ya know what does kill the romance? Not having the time for any sex or scenes!! It’s all about your shared mindset. If you both want it bad enough, make it happen.
Okay, so you say you desperately want to make time to play with your SO but every time a scheduled sex and/or scene arrives, one of you isn’t in the mood. What then? Well, obviously things come up and life gets in the way…but sometimes you need to push past those feelings in order to get into that BDSM mindset. Sending naughty, or downright dirty, texts to one another throughout the day will ignite your passions so much that you’re counting the minutes until your scheduled session later that evening. Inserting an anal plug and/or adorning nipple clamps under your clothing as you finish work, per your D-type’s orders, can help you leave Type A Personality Woman at the office and more easily transition to His Stupid Whore by the time you arrive Home. Listening to selections from the BDSM music playlist from your last session on the way Home from work can help you shake off your shitty day and help you transform back into the Dominant you know you are. If it matters to you, you WILL find a way. If not…well, you know where this is going.
What are some ways you and your SO make time to nurture and evolve your BDSM relationship? Can you share any tips you have learned that might help others?
DIY BDSM Project: Sensory Play Leather Tacked Vampire Gloves
You don’t need to be a millionaire to have your own amazing room filled with BDSM equipment!! Make some yourself!!
Sensory Play Leather Tacked Vampire Gloves…
Yes, Soft Limit or Hard Limit? Check out this post before the name scares you away! 😉
These tacked leather gloves can be used for several types of scenes and BDSM-related activities, such as sensory play, impact play and even blood play. They are very simple props and they’re highly effective at achieving any of the desired effects, depending upon the personal preferences of the parties involved.
They’re a very simple and fairly inexpensive DIY project for even the most un-handy of kinksters (pun totally intended!!). All you will need to create these gloves are:
1. a pair of leather gloves
2. a box of thumb tacks
3. hot glue and/or fabric glue
4. a wooden or plastic dowel.
That’s it! You can have your own pair of amazing BDSM gloves in just a few simple steps:
1. Turn the gloves inside out, using the dowel to fully turn the fingertips.
2. Press the thumb tacks through the fabric, with the pointed end poking through the leather, away from the wearer’s skin and toward the reciever.
3. Once you have the desired amount of thumb tacks pressed through in the patterns you desire, glue them all down on to the fabric part on the inside of the glove.
4. Allow the glue to dry.
5. When the glue is completely dried, you can use the dowel again to push the fingertips completely back right side out so you don’t scratch or poke yourself. Unless, of course, you’re into that kinda thing… 😉
Definitely one of the easiest DIY BDSM toys/props I’ve come across so far, hands down! (I’m so punny!)
Would you like to experiment with these sensory play leather gloves? Would you be able to make a pair (or two!) for you and your partner(s)? How would you like to use these gloves in a scene…? For sensory play, impact play, blood play? What’s your opinion?
There Is No Such Thing As a True Dominant (Or a True Submissive Or Anything Else, For That Matter)
This meme is incredibly accurate…especially for a meme. Dominance (and submission, for that matter) is a state of mind above than anything else…much more a state of mind than it is something sexual or even kinky. My Daddy and I can be in a crowded room, full of non-Lifestylers, and all He has to do is give me a two second look and my body viscerally reacts. My pulse quickens and my breath draws in more shallow. I can instantly hear His voice in my head, actually saying whatever needs to be communicated in His sexy, deepened voice and I literally start to melt. And, yes…I know what ‘literally’ means. That’s what I’m talking about when I proudly title Him with the honorific as my Dom, my Daddy Dom, my Daddy, my Sadist, my Other, my Love…He is both inside my head and inside my heart.
Daddy and I are practicing a 24/7 Dominance/submission (D/s) Caregiver dynamics in our home together. We have come to title our dynamic as such because we are a “Daddy Dom/babygirl” caregiver paradigm as well as D/s. Some Daddies and littles do not subscribe to the D/s power exchange at all, opting only for the caregiver aspect, so I will usually make that distinction.
Daddy and I have had hours of discussions about what works for us as individuals and as a couple, in terms of intimate wants and needs, emotional boundaries, sexual limits and desires and both short and long term goals for the future. We know one another very, very well. We have come to a place in our relationship where it’s easier to talk about the uncomfortable emotions and just be real with each other. It’s not always easy but it is worth it. I think that the biggest downfall of any alternative lifestyles relationship dynamic is when the parties have differences in their wants, needs, limits and desires because that creates unmet expectations. Unfulfilled expectations can be devastating to one party while the other party does not even know that there’s any issue going on in their partner’s(s’) mind and heart at all.
Some people form the foundations for these unfulfilled expectations even before the ever meet their partner!!
For example, let’s say I am new to the BDSM scene. I have done my research online and discussed personal experiences on topics of which i have personal interest with others through reputable Internet groups and I have gone out into my local community to begin to form a network of friendships. I have already decided, in my own mind, exactly what a “real” Dom looks like…and I have done this strictly from my own inaccurate impressions from books and articles as well as on my own unexperienced expectations of what Dominance, submission, and BDSM at large, actually are.
If the above list is what works for you right now, that’s great. However, no one can expect everyone to subscribe to their wants, needs or belief systems. At this point, a new kinkster is all about BDSM Fantasy instead of BDSM Reality because they simply do not know any better. A person who is new to kink will already have unrealistic perceptions of what participating in BDSM is all about…and to make matters worse, they usually expect everyone in the Lifestyle to agree with them. It just doesn’t work.
Your perception of what a “true” or “real” Dominant, submissive, Top, bottom and/or switch is will not match up with the realities of others. You cannot expect them to do so. It takes time and experience to understand that YKINMKBYKIOK (Your Kink Is Not My Kink But Your Kink Is O.K.). In other words, just because you are into something that I’m not into, it doesn’t make your desires “bad”, it just makes them not for me. This concept extends from inclinations towards sexual activities, predispositions to kinks and fetishes as well as desires and limits regarding interpersonal relationships and/or participation in any BDSM dynamics.
One of the most commonly overlooked aspects of BDSM is the vetting, questioning and interviewing of potential partners. People need to remember that not every person will be into what you’re into so it’s important to take the time to find someone who is.
Let me repeat that:
It takes time to find a compatible partner.
Talk about your wants and needs with your potential partner(s) without shame. Discuss your goals and limits with honesty and integrity. Be true to yourself. Allow others to be true to themselves without degradation or expectations. Understand that just because something doesn’t work for you doesn’t mean that it doesn’t work wonderfully for others.
A final point worth mentioning…
Honorable BDSMers come in all shapes and sizes. One size does definitely NOT fit all in this Lifestyle. That said, there ARE people who hurt and abuse others.
THESE PEOPLE ARE NOT PRACTICING BDSM. THE ARE PRACTICING ABUSE. Plain and simple.
When we label people as “true” and “real”, especially on social media, we set up an impossibly inaccurate standards to which others are forcefully made to adhere, even if just in our own minds. It’s unfair, biased and unrealistic to do this. There are definitely people who try to act like kinksters from every corner of the Lifestyle, but they are not practicing consensual, responsible BDSM. They are also the ones who hurt, abuse, rape and kidnap others for their own sick personal gratification. These people hide among us, but they are not practicing BDSM and I think it is very important that distinction is made. BDSM is all about CONSENT and people who hurt and abuse others do not have that consent. The two concepts are miles apart.
Vetting, questioning and interviewing of potential partner(s), with the help of tools such as various BDSM checklists for activities, kinks and fetishes, is your most powerful asset as you navigate through the Lifestyle. Taking the time to ask, research and answer these types of discussion prompts is yet another asset. Don’t become frenzied as you search for prospective partners, take your time and learn to know with whom you are dealing…or even if you care to deal with them at all.